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Your Ex-Boyfriend Won't Go Away? Do THIS!

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- Have you ever broken it off with a person and you know, from the bottom of your heart, from that rational side of your brain, that that person is bad news? Like they are literally the plague to your love life. However, that person continues to try and pry their way into your love life. And they try to win you back. If that's ever happened to you, keep watching this video, 'cause I'm gonna give you some ideas that I think you can use to keep this person out of your life and move forward, rather than looking in that rear view mirror, keep watching. (bright music) Hey there, Adam LoDolce, from LoveStrategies.com where I help successful single women get out there and attract long lasting love and do it with a proven strategy. And I just got off one of my Love Accelerator coaching calls and this story I think is gonna ring true for many of you beautiful ladies out there. So one of my clients, she joined about eight weeks ago, and she was actually engaged to be married earlier this year. She decided to break it off because she realized that this man was just not going to be a good long-term partner. I don't need to get into that. But then, she decided, of course, about eight weeks ago now, to join our program and to get really focused about her love life. And it seems like the moment that you do this and you really get intentional about moving forward in your life is the moment that someone tries to bring you back because they can sense that you're moving on. And so, her question was, should I engage with this person? Should I even consider talking to this guy? Should I spend time with him and see what it is that he really wants, and whether or not he's able to change? So I started off by asking her this first question, "If your friend were in the same exact situation "that you're in right now, "how would you advise your friend?" She said, "I would tell my friend "to get out of this situation as quickly as possible, "never talk to this man ever again." So that gave me everything that I needed to know from this point forward. Clearly, if she was willing to advise her friend to stay out of this situation, that basically means her rational side of her brain is talking to her emotional side of her brain saying, "No, no, no, no, no. "This guy is not a good fit." And so, I talked to her a little bit about this one concept that we teach in Love Accelerator, which is all about forgoing short-term pleasure in order to find long-term fulfillment. And this is not a very popular topic. Most people don't wanna think about this when it comes to their love life. But a lot of us, when we're dating and meeting new people, even if we were engaged, we kind of go about our love life going by what feels good. Oh, if it feels good to be with him, then maybe I should spend more time with him. If it feels good to keep talking to him, maybe I should do that. But that same logic is almost as if me saying like, it feels good to eat Sour Patch Kids every single night so I'm gonna keep doing that, okay? It's obviously not good for my long-term health. On the other hand, pursuing long-term fulfillment and long-term health requires forgoing some of that short-term pleasure and the short-term feel-good stuff. And eating kale, for example, when it comes to your health or when it comes to your love life, removing that person completely from your love life. It's a challenging thing to do. But at least that identifies the problem. And the problem is being disciplined. Being disciplined in your love life is truly the answer to finding a long-term fulfilling, healthy relationship. Because when you start to be more disciplined about the people you let into your life and saying no to the people who are just trying to extract value and start saying yes to the people who are trying to give value, then suddenly now, you're setting yourself up for longterm success. So long story short, with this particular situation, I don't tell people ever to break up with other people, okay? That's one thing I very, very rarely, unless there's emotional or physical abuse, I very rarely get involved in those situations because I don't think that's my place to do. But I will say that if I were in her shoes, what I would do is start rather than look in that rear view mirror, start looking in the future. Get crystal clear, which is what we call a little love step number two, get crystal clear about your love vision, the thing that you really want, the man, the relationship you really want, and only allow people in your life who are actually going to meet that love vision. And follow the little love steps, go make it happen, get out there and attract that right type of person, and don't allow this person to distract you from that cause. It might sound really cold, but you know what? That's what sets you up for success. So I wanna hear from you in the comments below, do you think that she should engage with her ex or she should move forward? Let me know. And if you've ever been in a situation like this and you want this type of guy into your love life, head on over to LoveStrategies.com, where we have a ton of resources that can help you through every single stage of finding love, attracting love, and finding a great relationship. Thank you so much for watching, I'll speak to you, you beautiful lady, next week. Bye-bye.

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