This is the text version of the YouTube video "Kevin Hart Is Terrified of…".
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-What animals did you bring for us tonight? -We've got some really good ones. -Don't you dare. -It's gonna be awesome. I'm starting off with something very cute and cuddly. This is Giselle. -Oh [bleep] [ Laughter and applause ] Come on, brother. -Kevin, stop. -Come on, man. -It's all good. -No surprises. -Come on, man. -It's an ostrich. It's a baby ostrich. -You can kiss my ass. [ Laughter ] -Kevin. -No. No, brother. No. -It's a baby -- -Look at that. -Look how cute! -She's so cute. Her name's Giselle. Look at her. Do you want to come pet her? -What is that noise? -Yeah, well, the babies, they make this little chirping noise. [ Ostrich chirping ] Isn't that amazing? -You know what she's saying? "I want some little black man." [ Laughter ] That's what she's saying. No, brother. -That is -- Now, how old is this baby? -Well, this one's only 2 months old. But they'll grow to be the biggest and most powerful bird on the planet. They can weigh over 260 pounds. They can go 40 miles an hour. They're so fast. It's amazing. [ Laughter ] -Good luck. Good luck. [ Laughter ] -At this time, I want to say, I will not be the fastest thing running. [ Laughter ] I'm definitely gonna get caught. -Come on in, come on in, pet her. -I don't need to pet her. I can see it, that's cool. I can see it from here. [ Laughter ] -Isn't she amazing? So, these little ones, they actually -- they have to be really tough and strong, because anything would try to eat these in the wild. So they have to be really good at fending for themselves. And those legs, that's where they get all the power. They can easily kill a lion with those legs. They're that powerful. [ Laughter ] But once they reach full size -- [ Laughter ] Aren't they just amazing? They're remarkable creatures. They really are. -Yeah, yeah. -Yeah, they're great. -Are you sure -- Are you sure you don't -- -Did you bring anything else? -She's really cuddly. -You can -- You can put that one back. [ Laughter ] -All right. Thanks, Giselle. -Oh, my God. -That's amazing. All right. -You got it? [ Cheering and applause ] All right. -That was fun. That was really good. So for this one -- -Are they -- -Yeah? -Are they all coming out from this side? -No, no. Some are coming from this side. -They're coming in from all directions. -All right. No, we won't surprise you. Kevin. -It's all good, it's all good. -It's all good. -All right, for this one, Jimmy, I want you to come around, as well. I want you to come around to the front. Let's all stand up for this one. Let's get ready. Okay. -Wait, wait. -So, for this is one -- This is LeBron, and LeBron is absolutely awesome. I'm gonna grab him now. You are gonna love him. So, all right. Come on out, LeBron. -No, stay, Kevin, no! We're in it together, man. -All right, Kevin, this is LeBron. [ Laughter ] -Kevin, you have to just get over your fears. You have to hold the snake. -You can hold him. He is so nice. -You can hold him. He's nice. And get over your fears. -Come on in. -Come in, Kevin, come in! Come in! -Let me tell you something. -No, Kevin. -It ain't gonna happen. [ Laughter ] -Dude, Kevin, just close your eyes and trust me. You'll do fine. -Let Jimmy do it first. Go ahead, Jimmy. You do it first. -We've got another one -- -[Bleep] Come on in. We've got another one. We've actually -- -Oh, no! -So this is Elvis. [ Laughter ] -Come on, man. Come on. Come on, man. [ Laughter ] Come on, man. Come on, man. [ Cheers and applause ] Go ahead, man. -That's awesome. -All right. Okay. Kevin, if I do it, you got to do it. -So this is LeBron and Elvis. -Aha. Ah. -So, you're holding Elvis there. Now, how awesome is that? That's perfect. You just hold him there. -Yeah. -He'll just glide right through your hands. So, now Jimmy's -- Jimmy's on it. He is amazing. Kevin, it's your turn now. Here you go. [ Laughter ] They're totally fine. -Kevin, it's easy. -They're the coolest snakes. They really are. -Just try it. Please, just do it. [ Cheering and applause ] Where are they from? -Oh. [ Audience chanting "Kevin!" ] -Let me tell you what I've gotten really good at in my life. Saying no. [ Laughter ] No. -That's okay. -Jimmy, you hold it. It looks good. -It's really cool. So, these snakes, they're kingsnakes. California banded kingsnakes. -You know how to deal with big snakes. -Have you seen his Tommy Johns ad? [ Laughter and applause ] You got take a look at this picture. You'll see what I'm talking about. All right, he's not gonna do it. -Just pat them. -Does it -- Does it -- Do they bite? Seriously? -Well, they can bite. -You lost me at "well." -Okay, all right. -I was about to do it. Did you see me? I was about to go. -Yeah, no, all right. -"Do they bite?" "Well, uh..." -They can eat venomous snakes. They're not venomous, but they can easily take down a venomous snake, no problem at all. -Is there a chance that it could bite me? -How about this? You do the next animal. -You do the next one. -It's gonna be worse. I'd rather try this. [ Laughter ] I'd rather try this. -It won't be worse.
-It's not gonna crawl up me? -It's not gonna crawl. -I'll just hold it in my hand. -Yeah, put your hands out. Exactly. Exactly, that's it. [ Cheers and applause ] That's it. -It's not gonna crawl up me? -It's not gonna crawl. -I'll just hold it in my hand. -Yeah, put your hands out. Exactly. Exactly, that's it. [ Cheers and applause ] That's it. -Yo, I'm serious. Listen to me. -You'll be good. -If it start moving, come get the snake. -I'm right there for you. -I'll fight you, man. I will fight you. [ Laughter ] I promise you, I'mma a swing on you if you don't get the snake. -Hurry up, make a decision, 'cause my snake's getting nervous. -So, what I do? So, I'mma go stand? -Yep. So you can stand right here and then put your hands out. I'll be with you the whole way. -Hey, man, on my mother, if this snake... [ Laughter ] -So, they're beautiful animals. -Get it so it don't -- Aah! -So, put your hands out like that. -My snake's getting weird. -I can't do it, I can't do it. -I can't do it, Jimmy. -Next one, next one. Next one. We'll try the next one. -Y'all saw me try, guys. I tried. I'm sorry. -My snake stopped moving, so I'm getting -- -Yeah, you're doing great. -All right. -That's LeBron and Elvis. -LeBron and Elvis. Love them so much. Thank you. Thank you. [ Cheers and applause ] Got it? -Yo. Hey, Jimmy... My ass is sweating, Jimmy. [ Laughter ] I'm being 100% honest. I got so much sweat dripping down my ass right now. [ Laughter ] I'm so nervous. -Holy moly. -I'm so nervous. -Holy mackerel. All right, all right, here we go. All right, what do we have? What's the next thing? Kevin, get up here. Get up here. You have to, come on. Trust me. Get up here, dude. -I'm so nervous. -Come up here. Please. -You can sit down for this one. -Sit down for this. I'll stay with you. Come on. -It's cute, it's fluffy. This one's little. -It's cute and fluffy and little. Please, come on. -Go on that side. -No. -Absolutely fine. -I don't like how y'all trapping me. [ Laughter ] I feel like y'all trying to close me in. Go here. Let me go right here. -All right. So, for this one, though... Now, Kevin... Kevin, you can hold this one. -Okay. -But for this one, I just need to make sure you're really nice and calm and don't move too much for this one. And also, don't breathe on it too much, 'cause it'll set it off. -Close your eye, close your eye. -You'll be fine. -Before you pull it out, it don't sound like this is the animal for me. I don't think -- [ Laughter ] I don't think this is the one that -- -Jimmy's handled something similar to this. He's handled a similar species. -Yeah, I got it. -Close your eyes, put your hands out. -No, no. -Just trust me, Kevin. -Listen... [ Laughter ] -No, it won't come from behind, I promise. -Get it out and let me see it. -Okay. -No, no, no! Don't -- No, no, no. Just close your eyes, and please, Kevin -- -I can't. -Kevin, please, just trust me. -It's not gonna happen, Jimmy. [ Laughter ] -Close your eyes. Close your eyes. -Don't get behind me. Don't get behind me. -Nothing behind you. -Don't get behind me. -No, I'm in front of you. I'm just saying, if you close your eyes and put your hands out -- -This is how black people die in a horror movie. [ Laughter ] -Not true! That's not true at all. I'll telling you what. Just go like that and close your eyes, and he's gonna put something fluffy on your hand. -I got to see it, brother. I got to see it. -No, no, no. I -- I will -- No, I'm not -- [ Laughter ] Just try. Trust me. -Jimmy, there's no -- I can't. It's not in me. I'm sorry. Physically, I'm not capable of processing what you're saying right now. [ Laughter ] I can't. I'm sorry. I love you, and it's your birthday. Just pull it out. Let me see what it is first. -Okay. -All right, okay. [ Laughter ] -Okay, now it is -- It's so -- It's got the cutest little face, little beady eyes. It's awesome. You'll love it. -Wait, wait, wait. Beady? -Yeah, like -- You'll see, you'll see. -Okay, go, go, go. Let's see what -- Is it fast? -No, no, not at all. -She's really cute. Her name's Big Red, and she is adorable. She's my favorite -- my favorite animal tonight. -What's taking him so long, Jimmy? -I don't know. [ Laughter ] -Jimmy, what's taking him so long over there, Jimmy? -So, this is Big Red. [ Audience gasps ] -Stay. Stay. -She's a red knee tarantula. -Stay. -She's so cool. [ Laughter, cheers, applause ] -Hey. Hey, man. -Are you sure? -No, no, no. No, no, no, no. No. -She's beautiful. She's great. -I'm behind you. Stay. You better stay your ass over there, man. [ Laughter ] -He's 14 years old. -Hey, I don't care, Jimmy. -He's 14 years old. -I don't care, Jimmy. -He's 14. -Okay. It's your birthday. -Yeah. -You should hold that spider. [ Laughter and applause ] It's your birthday, man. -No. -Oh, my God. Go ahead, Jimmy. -Yeah. -Go ahead. -Come on in. -That look like it jump. That look like -- [ Laughter ] Yeah, that ain't gonna happen for me, bro. -They're really cool. They're the most amazing spider ever. They are my favorite. They're so cool. So, now what you want do is... -Oh. -...if you want, you can put your hands out. So put both hands out there on the desk. -Oh. -You'll be fine. Seriously, you'll be all good. [ Cheers and applause ] -There we go. -Oh! Ohh! Ohh [bleep] Oh, my God! -That was perfect. That's great! She loves you. -Oh, Jimmy, I'm nervous for you. [ Laughter ] I'm nervous for you, man. -Be quiet, be quiet. -Is it -- Is it -- Is it, like, the loud noises, what would it do? -Oh, my gosh. Do not even make a loud noise. -As long as you don't breathe on it or anything, you'll be good. [ Laughter ] You'll be fine. -It's just that breath that they don't like. -You're getting too close now. [ Laughter ] He's not gonna know whether it's my breath or your breath. -The only thing that could upset that is breath? -That's it. That's it, totally. -Kevin, get away. -Jimmy! [ Laughter ] -There you go. -But their venom is fine. -It's fine. -Jimmy! -Oh, my goodness! Please, I'm not kidding. I can -- No. Oh, my God! -You're all right. You're all right. -Oh, my God. Please get him away. -There, I got him. -Oh, my God. Dude. -There we go. Are you sure, Kevin? Are you sure? -I'm gonna kill you! [ Laughter ] Dude, that was the scariest thing that ever happened in my lifetime! What is wrong with you?! Gaah! [ Cheers and applause ] Ugh. -[ Laughing ] Oh, God. Oh, my God. Oh. [ Laughing ] -Oh, God. All right. -I started yelling, y'all didn't look at Jimmy's face. -Can you put that away? -Are you sure, mate? -What else did you bring? You have one more. -Fair enough. -One more animal. -Okay, we've got one more animal. I'm just gonna put her away. [ Laughter ] -Jimmy, I said, "Jimmy!" You said, "Take it, take it, take it, take it, take it!" [ Laughter ] -All right, what do we got? What do we got? What are we doing? -What you got? -So, for this last animal, we're all gonna come down here. We're gonna join you down here. -Well, I'mma go up here. [ Laughter and applause ] I'mma go up here. -Dude, no. -I'mma go up here. -No, all right, come on. It's gonna be fine. This'll be fine, here we go. -I don't like nothing standing behind me. [ Cheers and applause ] -This one's gonna be good. I promise you, this one will be awesome. -Okay. -So this one's name is -- He's actually got a very cute name. It's Squire. And Squire is a falcon. -A what? -He's a falcon. All right, so come on out, Squire. There we go. -Come on now. -He's a lanner falcon. -Come on, now. -They are beautiful birds. They really are. -You know what birds like? Small objects. [ Laughter ] -Wow. -So, they use those feet -- They've got really strong talons, those killing claws. That's what they use to actually hunt their prey. They're really quick, they're keyed in to movement. So, what I want to do with this one -- They're amazing at flying. So I'm thinking, if you two want to go up into the audience and we'll get this one flying to you. [ Cheers and applause ] Does that sound good? What do you reckon? -Come on. -Okay, so -- [ Cheers and applause ] -Yeah. -No. No! -You stay here, Kevin. -No. -You stay here. [ Cheers and applause ] -I'll stay here. -All right. -I'll head up this side. -You go up that one? -You go, Jimmy. -Okay, I'll stand in. [ Cheers and applause ] -Thank you. Oh, wow. -Gonna put it down to your side to start... -Okay. So, what we're gonna do is, I'm gonna call him over, and once he's ready, he'll fly over. Make sure you don't put your hands up, though, 'cause those talons are very sharp. -Oh, my God. -Kevin, don't move. Kevin, put your hands down. -Jimmy, I saw this in a movie. -Kevin, put your -- -That's how people die! -Aww! Awesome! How cool is that? [ Cheers and applause ] -Good job. Awesome, huh? Okay. Jimmy, it's your turn. [ Applause ] Hey, look over there, Squire. It's Jimmy. There you go. Ooh, he's on you now. There we go. He's on. Oh, awesome. [ Cheers and applause ] Nice. -Wow. -Okay. So, what we're gonna do, we're gonna keep this nice and still just like that. Just like that. Perfect. You're good. So just keep that one still. [ Laughter and applause ] -She's looking at you, Kev. She's looking at you, Kev. -All right, we ready? -Don't look at me. No, no. -Ready, Kevin? [ Laughter ] -Look that way. -Squire. -No, look that way. [ Laughter ] -What's happening, Jimmy? -Oh, here we go. Here he goes. [ Cheering and applause ] -Oh [bleep] -Yes! -Oh! -Good job. -Oh! Jimmy, get it! Jimmy -- Jimmy, get it! -Robert Irwin, everybody! -Jimmy, get it! Jimmy, get it! Jimmy, get it! -"Crikey!" -- -Get it, Jimmy! Jimmy, get it! "Crikey! It's the Irwins" premieres October 28th, at 8:00 p.m., on Animal Planet. We'll be right back. Stick around, everybody. -Y'all got to get it, Jimmy. [ Cheers and applause ]