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- Love, it's the most powerful emotion that humans can feel, and people for thousands of years have been trying to actually uncover what is love, and how do people actually fall in love? And more importantly for you sexy, single ladies, I'm pretty sure you've been trying to decode exactly how it is that men will fall in love with you. But there's a little bit of a problem when you're trying to figure this out. Falling in love has many different stages, and if you don't understand these stages it can be really easy to get way ahead of yourself in the relationship. So in this special video right now, I'm going to be talking about the five steps that men go through in order to fall in love. Keep watching. (gentle music) Hey there, Adam LoDolce from sexyconfidence.com, and in this very special video, you're probably noticing (beep) has changed up a little bit, and that is because Sexy Confidence is going through a complete re-launch. Coming to you on November 11th, which happens to be singles day, one, one, one, one, get it? On singles day, I'm going to be releasing a ton of content that's going to help you through every single stage of finding love, keeping love, break up advice, and even self love. And I'm doing this because I'm re-launching the Sexy Confidence Club, so mark your calendars. A lot of cool stuff is coming very soon. I can't tell you how excited I am for this. This is truly the biggest thing we've done here at Sexy Confidence since really starting the entire brand. So as a way of building up to the big launch, I'm going to be answering your questions every week until November 11th. So next week I'm going to be answering a question from Instagram, so if you're watching this video anywhere else but Instagram, head on over to Instagram, watch this video, and leave a comment below with your question. I'll choose one question to answer on next week's video. So let's get back to talk about love. Back when I first started as a dating coach, geez, almost 10 years ago. Jesus, I'm getting old. I used to coach men on how to flirt and confidently meet you sexy, single ladies, and one thing I learned is that men go through a lot of crazy stages building up to truly falling in love and staying in love. So I'm going to walk you through every single step a man goes through to falling in love, and by the way, not every single step is created equal. So the first step is physical attraction. I'll never forget when I first met Jessica, geez, almost five years ago, at a bar on New Year's Day, and she was friends of a group of my friends, and I saw her, and the very first thing I realized, is of course she's gorgeous, but as well she just had this energy that just radiated out of her. My very first thought was she's totally out of my league. Not only was she beautiful, but she was fun and she was friendly. (imitates explosion) I didn't know that existed anymore. So, for all you sexy, single ladies who are spending way too much time on your hair and your makeup and your perfume, on all that stuff, I'm here to tell you, put that stuff aside right now, and instead just focus on bringing that energy, that positive energy, to a conversation. Men will be just magnetically drawn to it, just like I was with Jessica. And yes, we are getting married next August. So it worked. Step number two is emotional attraction. Building emotional attraction with somebody is all about that chemistry. Like when you first meet somebody for the first time, and you just click with one another. Have you ever met someone for the first time and it just feels like you have known that person for the past 10 years of your life? You just can not stop connection on different things you have in common. If you've ever experienced that before, comment below saying, "It's all about the chemistry." And this is why physical attraction is only one very small component to actually attracting true love, or attracting the man that you want because if you only have physical attraction, you have no emotional attraction, then he's not gonna stick around for a while. So the next phase that men go through when it comes to falling in love is the bonding phase. Now this phase usually comes around that three to six month mark of a relationship, where it's no longer new, you no longer have this neuro peripherin, and this love chemicals flowing through your veins of this new love relationship, and now (beep) is getting real. And this is a good thing, by the way. This is where you get to know the real person behind that shield that everyone puts up early on in the relationship. When the man is bonding with a woman he's really thinking to himself, "Do I actually like this person, "or was I just drawn to this person "because I'm attracted to them." Bonding is really really important, and if you're finding that a lot of your relationships end at that three to six month period, then perhaps your only chasing attraction, your only chasing your sexuality when it comes to men, instead of finding men that you could potentially also be friends with. As I always say, the best match, if you wanna find it, is the best friend that you are attracted to. And this bonding phase is all about discovering whether or not that person can actually be a best friend. Step number four is compatibility. This, I would say, is the least fun part of falling in love. But, if you get this wrong then the whole relationship can completely fall apart. Discovering whether or not you are actually compatible is all about discovering, do you have the same shared values? Do you have the same religious values? Do you want to live in the same place? Do you have the same vision for the future of your life? These are the types of questions that you really wanna be taking a look at before you make any big decisions such as, living together, getting married, having children together. Because the relationships that don't think about this, and kind of stuff it under the rug and don't think about all these issues that they really have, it falls apart in the future. Trust me, my mother is a divorce attorney, and this is where stuff falls apart. Do you know what the number one reason is for divorce? Nope, it's not cheating. It is fighting over money. So the compatibility phase also is about money, and your partners relationship with money as well as your relationship with money, and how that will actually work in the future. Is he super frugal and you are big spender? Well, maybe you might wanna rein it in, or vice versa. Does he drive a BMW and take you out to steak dinners every single night, but he doesn't have a 401k or a nickel to his name? That is a problem now, and it will definitely be a problem once he has two kids and a mortgage. (imitates gun shot) And the final phase of how men actually fall in love is unwavering lifetime commitment. This is when a person decides that everything is aligned and they are ready to commit their life to that person. Not only are they emotionally ready, but this is the person they want to spend the rest of their life with. And depending where you are in you life, and how old you are, and under your circumstances, this can take different people a different amount of time. Some people it takes a couple years to get there. For me, it took me about three and a half years even though I knew when I first met Jessica that I was probably gonna marry her, but it took me that period of time to really decided to fully propose and dive in deep. Other relationships, I've seen it take five, six years because they have kids, and they were already divorced, and they wanted to take more time. Most people actually jump into this lifelong commitment way too soon. You don't have to decide within one year of meeting a person that they are the person to spend the rest of your life with. It's gonna take some time to determine whether or not you're a really good fit, so slow your roll. So if you are ready to fall in love this upcoming year just comment right there below saying, "I am ready for love." So don't forget to mark your calendars for November 11th. We are relaunching The Sexy Confidence Club. It is going to blow your mind. We have amazing content coming really soon. And if you enjoyed this video please give it a like on YouTube. Don't forget to subscribe on YouTube. If you're watching this on Instagram don't forget to follow, and if you wanna follow me on Instagram check out Official Sexy Confidence, that's the handle. Thank you so much for watching, and I will choose a comment from Instagram for next weeks video. Thank you for watching, I'll speak to you next week you sexy, single lady, Bye-bye.